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Post by porgyman on May 8, 2015 9:27:26 GMT -5
 Further proof that Florida should be returned to Spain... "Jeff Waters walked into a Bank of America Monday morning and attempted to cash a check for $368,000,000,000 dollars....Tellers at the Jacksonville bank were immediately suspicious." Waters explained to bank officials a homeless man named Tito Watts sold him the blank check several months ago for $100 and told Waters the check would clear for any amount of money that Waters wanted to write it for. Waters wanted the $368 billion to start an Italian restaurant. It’s always been my dream to own the best Italian restaurant in the earth,” Waters told police. “I’m 10% Italian. Cooking authentic Italian food is in my blood. I had planned to make the restaurant 80 million sq. feet and able to accommodated (sic) 30 million eaters at once, plus it was gonna be totally underwater so people could look at sharks while they ate. But the bank wouldn’t give me my money they owed me. Tito said the check was good for any amount I wanted to write it for. So blame Tito, not me. I’m as innocent as a schoolgirl.” In addition to a forgery count, Waters was charged with unlawfully carrying Chinese throwing stars and possessing bath salts. He was released after posting $23,000 bail. moron.com/florida-man-attempts-to-cash-368-billion-check/?fb_ref=Default |
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Post by frostlich on May 8, 2015 9:30:27 GMT -5
God bless the bank tellers that became immediately suspicious. Whatever theyre paying them is not enough.
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Post by Gunnails on May 8, 2015 9:34:01 GMT -5
10% Italian, that explains it.
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Post by Jets Things on May 8, 2015 9:51:24 GMT -5
How the fuck did this guy manage to post bail?
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Post by porgyman on May 8, 2015 10:06:04 GMT -5
How the fuck did this guy manage to post bail? He wrote a check! |
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Post by Peebag on May 8, 2015 10:09:56 GMT -5
How the fuck did this guy manage to post bail? He wrote a check! Bazingz! |
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Post by PK on May 8, 2015 10:31:57 GMT -5
LMAO!!
But seriously? They had to arrest him? They guy obviously needs mental health services...he really shouldn't have been sent to jail. I know, technically forgery. But 368 billion to open an 80 million sq ft restaurant?
The cops should have dropped him off at the Office of Mental Health...
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Post by Touchable on May 8, 2015 11:07:18 GMT -5
That restaurant sounds fucking awesome!
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Post by Gunnails on May 8, 2015 11:09:48 GMT -5
LMAO!! But seriously? They had to arrest him? They guy obviously needs mental health services...he really shouldn't have been sent to jail. I know, technically forgery. But 368 billion to open an 80 million sq ft restaurant? The cops should have dropped him off at the Office of Mental Health... ============================================ Yeah I know, Tito is the man behind all this, and his plan almost worked if not for those cranky ol bank tellers. |
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Post by 2milehighJet on May 8, 2015 11:19:05 GMT -5
That restaurant sounds fucking awesome! He will be serving red yarn and brown rubber balls. |
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Post by Deleted on May 8, 2015 11:22:45 GMT -5
wtf? i thought ragu went to chicago
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Post by jetswin on May 8, 2015 11:24:18 GMT -5
this is my favorite post in a while, and the picture is nearly as amazing as the story lol
a golden monocle for you good sir!
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Post by jetstream23 on May 8, 2015 14:19:53 GMT -5
I like how he turned the check and kept writing the zeroes down the side.
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Post by jcappy on May 8, 2015 14:21:10 GMT -5
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Post by ruby2 on May 8, 2015 14:39:30 GMT -5
Well thats the damn best thing I read on the internet in quite some time
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